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GOOD THERAPY

Positive Ways of Dealing with Disappointment

Improve your mental state

Disappointment puts you in a lower state of consciousness dominated by fear, sadness, grief or apathy. It can overwhelm you to the point where it seems like the world is ending and in such a state it will be difficult to think logically or rationally. It’s important that you avoid making any important decisions when you are feeling this way. Instead, focus on bringing yourself up to a more positive place mentally before taking any actions.

You can improve your mental state by engaging in positive activities that make you happy. Anything that you enjoy doing and relieves stress can help you recharge when dealing with disappointment. If you love reading, pick up one of your favorite books. If you like to take walks and be outside, go to the park. Just do whatever it is that makes you feel better.

Align with your desires

Often times, we feel disappointment because we are overly attached to a certain outcome of a situation. When things don’t work out the way we hoped, we feel disappointed, let down, betrayed. This is natural, but if you think in terms of underlying desires rather than external goals, you can soothe those negative feelings.

It may have been your goal to get a job at a particular company, but your desire behind that goal is to have a good paying job in a field that you enjoy. If you think only in terms of your goal, not getting the job seems like a catastrophe. But if you think in terms of your desire you’ll see that, while not getting the job is unfortunate, it isn’t the end of the line. There is still a job out there that meets your desires. So ask yourself: What are my actual desires that are driving my goals and expectations? And then explore the other avenues that can bring you closer to your desires.

Confront your illusions

When we are disappointed, it is because we have certain illusions about what reality should be. If we get hung up over these illusions, we will stay in a negative place mentally and not be able to move on. You must understand that the perceptions you have of the situation are holding you back.

Become aware of what illusions you have about the situation and its outcome. Once you see these illusions, you can start to release yourself from them. If you are disappointed in a romantic relationship that has ended you may feel as if you have lost the potential for a great relationship. But by ending the relationship, your partner has shown a lack of commitment, proving that it was never going to be a great relationship. The idea of a perfect relationship with that person is an illusion and is holding you back from moving on to better things.

Take a positive outlook

Choose to see your disappointment as an opportunity rather than a setback. It’s easy to think of a disappointing situation as a failure or a step in the wrong direction but instead, you should focus on what you can learn from the situation. Look for helpful information that you can take away from the experience and put to good use in your future endeavors.

Every disappointment can teach you something about yourself or the world around you. Allow the disappointment to shape you in a positive way, making you a stronger person than you were before.